these past few months I've realized

the importance of understanding your own faith.

Pinterest

I think it's really easy to get lost into what your family believes and just accepting that, without taking a good hard look yourself, and find out what makes you compassionate, makes you ticked, and what you're facing when you fight the good fight of faith (2 Timothy 4:7). It's really easy to get lost in all of it and just give up. Most people do, because they don't want to have to decide.. they just want to "live". Unfortunately though, when it comes to faith, if you're serious, there are choices that have to be made.

Choices that, for some, can become so overwhelming that it pushes them away. Deciding on who you want to be, however, is a fact of life. What kind of person you become will, inevitably, follow you for the rest of your life -- obvious enough, right? Well, not for everyone. I think it just becomes avoidable for most. Some have this idea that if they just blend in, do what's "normal" that they will be the happiest, most comfortable.

Once you've made the choice to not be lukewarm (Rev 3:16) and really take your life and make something of it that involves bringing glory to a God that truly loves you, who crafted you specifically for His will, His will that makes everything come together, you have something else to be faced with.

This something is what I've come to understand, as overstated as it is, you really cannot expect (or think you have earned) the right to happiness. Sounds a little depressing, I know. For myself, I overestimated myself and anytime that something didn't make me happy I began to question whether or not I was living in His will, like really underestimating His greatness, a big mistake.

It gets really tough to be in a "rut", I guess you could say, when you see the light at the end of the tunnel, and yet it feels so far away. That's where I'm at right now. Almost every aspect of my life is in this "waiting game". It sucks.

I've had so many ups and downs this past few months, it's been so hard. In the midst of those hard times I questioned, "Am I supposed to be here?"

I need a change of perspective.

I'm here for a reason, so what can I make of this? How can I use this to glorify Him? 

Preparation.

                                                                {source}

I feel thankful for Honduras.

I reflected over my lifestyle today and now I am begging for this mission trip to enlighten me and my unproductive mindset. I have all these opportunities around me right now to serve and be loyal to my God. I somehow keep hitting and missing in making the 'serve' part an every day service. Remembering to wake up everyday and understand and fully accept the amount of grace that has been poured into my life because of Jesus Christ.

Why must I cling to earthly idols that are filled with no satisfaction?

For example, I love food. I doubt I am alone in this thinking since it is Survival 101 to eat. We need food. However, sometimes I plan my day around what food I will be eating. Silly right? I can get pretty high maintenance too, i.e I hate sandwiches. I pretty much dislike cold food because I think warm food tastes better. Weird.

I am absurd. The thing is, I have always been able to be this way. I am lucky enough to have not only an oven, but a microwave, a Chick-Fil-A so that in desperate need I will have a good meal close by. I find myself not being able to just settle. The more I think about it, the worse it really is.

Now am I going to stop eating? No, let us not talk crazy. The thing is, must I really spend so much money on meals all the time? No, and not for financial reasons either (though my bank account is sighing in relief) but because in order to give my time to my Lord, I need to serve Him. When I have all this money left over, what on earth will I do with it?

Glad you asked.

I follow this lovely blog written by Annie and when it was lent she decided to do random acts of kindness, here's some examples :

1. Mail off surprises to a friend who's far away.
2. Do some spring cleaning and make your trash someone else's treasure.
3. Introduce a friend to a favorite movie or song.
4. Pay for someone's dinner.
5. Go to your favorite store and instead of buying something for yourself (like you know you would), pick out a "just because" gift for a friend or loved one.
6. Hang out with someone who could use the company.
7. Sacrifice time out of your day to call a long-distance friend.
8. Buy $5 McDonald's gift cards to keep in your glove compartment. Next time you're at a stoplight, use one to help someone in need.
9. Share a recent read with someone you know would enjoy it too (I just did this with One Thousand Gifts).
10. Purchase the meal or drink of the person behind you in the drive-thru line.
11. Make a care package for someone who is sick or shut in.
12. Create a playlist for someone you know would appreciate it.
13. Bring home a small surprise for your spouse or roommate.
14. Send flowers to a friend on a random day.
15. Bake a sweet treat or pot a pretty plant and leave it on your neighbor's doorstep.
16.Buy flowers for your mom.
17. Cook dinner for a few friends, maybe invite someone you might not normally.
18. Offer to help babysit for couple friends in need of a date.
19. Plan a date for your significant other. 
20. Say "thank you" to a teacher, coworker, or volunteer who normally gets ignored. 




 I think these serve as a much better use of my money and time, don't you? What other acts of service would you add to the list?